Thursday, August 25, 2005

whoo doggy

I just don't ever write regularly enough, do I?

Let me see, life this summer has been strange. I've been working my ass off at Starbucks, at 5:30 every single morning that I'm actually working. Seems like it could really be perfect, because then I get off at 2, but it's not quite that easy. My evening social life is totally shot, because I really HAVE to be in bed at 9, otherwise I get way too little sleep. My eating schedule is also unreasonable fucked up too ... I don't want to eat anything pretty much all day long until 4pm rolls around and then I'm starting. I'm pretty much on the one-meal-per-day diet. Sooooo not good for me. Basically, I'm a walking disaster area. Sucks a lot, I'll tell you what.

Everything with J is going fantastically. It's almost as if we made the decision to get married (which is really how it happened, the whole proposal thing was done quite a ways into our thinking about the details already) and then from there we're figuring out how to make the relationship work. Truth be told, I don't think that's actually all that bad a way of going about things. We know we're in it for the long-haul, now we just have to figure out how to actually make the long-haul functionable. I guess it just seems to me like now both of us are able to breathe a sigh of relief and take the necessary step back (i.e. not freak out and think we're going to leave each other) so that we can figure out how to spend the rest of our lives together.

Lord knows, it doesn't seem like it should be this difficult, but somehow it really is.

And that's pretty much it for me these days. I'm spending a lot of time musing on relationships and the future of the world and how to raise children and how to redecorate my house, etc. I'm really settling into a serious nesting phase. Kinda cool.